Tuesday, 27 July 2010
random :D
I'm not going to deny that even though I usually know I deserve it, or I realize it's coming to me, I sometimes try to maneuver my way out of a spanking. It's really senseless because I'm not that sly and it's pretty painfully obvious. It's just that sometimes it really, really hurts, and it's because he wants to get his point across- I get that. In the heat of the moment though, I always catch myself wanting to yell "But you just don't understand how bad it hurts!"Except that he does.
Once I felt like I had gotten all of my questions out, I started saying "but it's still not the..." and he finished with: "same, I know." Because it's not... I'm not judging anyone who incorporates domestic discipline into their lives without having a relationship with one another, but I can't imagine that it would feel the same, at least for me. Part of what hurts so badly about being punished is that I know the reason I'm being punished is because I either hurt Him, or he's disappointed in me. It's exclusive to him.
He does realize that, obviously, but he also feels he gained some insight, which is what he wanted more of anyway. To this day, I still can't picture him being in that role, but I can appreciate the genuineness of wanting to learn what's going on in my head when I take a trip over his knee. He's never burned my bottom quite like he received it though, and for that, I'm pretty grateful.